Shocked and appalled

Part of the price one pays for being an editor is having to read occasional letters from crackpots.

Part of the price one pays for being an editor is having to read occasional letters from crackpots. In my case, most seem to be from right-wing Colonel Blimp types (always male for some reason) who are shocked – shocked and appalled! – that I have criticized capitalism or defended socialism.

I have a small checklist to evaluate them. I’ve never received a letter with all of these features, but today one came very close.

  • Starts out more or less politely, quickly descends into insults
  • Includes at least one paragraph of pseudo-scientific gibberish to illustrate some totally incomprehensible point
  • Includes long quotes from something I wrote, to illustrate my depravity and/or ignorance
  • In case I missed the point, highlights parts of those quotes in multiple colors
  • Adds more emphasis by putting some sentences (sometimes even entire paragraphs) in CAPITAL LETTERS
  • Challenges me to a public debate (probably because it’s illegal to challenge me to a duel)
  • Compares me to Hitler, Mao, or  Stalin – usually all three
  • Says I want the whole world to be like North Korea
  • Brags about his vastly superior knowledge and/or experience of the real world, where real people can see right through idiots like me
  • Quotes Churchill (sometimes others, but usually Churchill) on the evils of socialism
  • Says I am a hypocrite for not giving away all my worldly goods
  • Predicts, correctly, that I won’t publish his crackpot letter

This is why god made spam filters.

—–
Ian

More from the editor’s notebook…

8 Comments

  • actually I would criticize rather all those many disgusting consequences and details in context with “capitalism” — where people see and feel what it means for them — (than just repeat crude statements that capitalism is bad) 

  • Ian I like this list, it sums up the stock responses of people who out of, I guess, a deep personal insecurity cling on to the predominant socio-political system of their time, absolutely unable to think out of the box so to speak.

  • Stupidity and arrogance cannot prevail. Blood sucking capitalism and capitalists will have to be extinct sooner than later if the world is to sustain. You are a catalyst; please continue your efforts for CHANGE for a better world, that is what sensible and responsible people desire! We are the majority, yes 99.9%!

  • Stupidity and arrogance cannot prevail. Blood sucking capitalism and capitalists will have to be extinct sooner than later if the world is to sustain. You are a catalyst; please continue your efforts for CHANGE for a better world, that is what sensible and responsible people desire! We are the majority, yes 99.9%!